Ancient Greece – Timeline
Timeline of ancient greece Neolithic (New Stone Age) c.7000 BCE Early settlers begin farming in Greece. 3200-2300 BCE Cycladic culture on the
Shenanigans: Came to power by overthrowing his dad, Cronus, and forcing him to sick up all his siblings (best not to ask). After the battle that followed, Zeus shared the world with his brothers, Poseidon and Hades. He gave all the other Olympian deities their roles.
Shenanigans: Hera gets so jealous of Zeus’s other partners that she sometimes causes horrible things to happen to them.
Fun fact: Hera’s chariot is pulled by a pair of peacocks, which presumably means she doesn’t get anywhere fast, but looks so good going there that she doesn’t care very much.
Shenanigans: Demeter is often depicted carrying a burning torch. This is a reference to the search for her daughter Persephone, who was abducted by champion creep of the underworld, Hades. She also taught humans how to grow and use corn, so she invented Doritos, practically.
Shenanigans: He created the first ever horse as an offering to the city of Athens, so that its citizens would choose him as their patron god. Instead they chose Athena’s gift: the olive tree. Maybe they wrapped up the horse and sneakily re-gifted it?
Fun fact: Sailors of ancient Greece sacrificed bulls to the sea in order that they might enjoy safe passage under Poseidon’s protection.
Shenanigans: In some stories Athena is literally born from Zeus’s head after one of his headaches gets horribly out of control. Valiant, pure, fair and intelligent, Athena is Zeus’s favourite offspring (despite the head thing, ed). The city of Athens is named after her.
Shenanigans: Whereas Athena is known for her strategic skills, Ares is more about hitting things indiscriminately. It may come as no surprise to find that most temples to Ares were located in Sparta, home to some of history’s most notorious warriors.
Fun fact: Ares and Athena are bitter rivals. Good luck breaking that one up!
Shenanigans: Apollo is the son of Zeus and Leto, and the twin brother of Artemis. It’s his job to bring the Sun across the sky. He is also the god of medicine and ill-health, archery and music. He wears a lot of different hats, is what I am trying to say.
Shenanigans: The Katniss Everdeen of the ancient world, Artemis was born before Apollo and so helped her mother deliver him despite having literally been born yesterday. She’s been known to transform adversaries into stags so that they can be eaten by their own hounds. Nice.
Shenanigans: Poseidon and Apollo both wanted to marry Hestia, but she refused. Sometimes Dionysus, newcomer god of the vine, is represented instead of her.
Shenanigans: Flattered by Paris, Aphrodite granted him Helen of Sparta, the most beautiful (and already married) woman in the world, causing a lot of trouble in the process. Her chariot is drawn by swans – they can break your arm, you know*.
* They probably can’t. This, like everything else on this page, is a myth.
Shenanigans: Hermes conducts the souls of the dead into the underworld, so when Demeter’s daughter, Persephone, travels back to the upper world, it is him who escorts her. He is also the god of traders and thieves, which must cause conflicts of interest on a daily basis. In paintings and statues you will know him by his natty winged hat and sandals.
Shenanigans: The son of Zeus and Hera and husband to Aphrodite, he makes all of the beautiful things on Mount Olympus. Aphrodite is having an ongoing love affair with Ares though. Maybe Hephaestus knows and that is why he spends so much time in his shed, hitting things with a hammer.
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Words: Freya Hardy. Illustration: Kaley McKean
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